I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I want a musical about memes.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
