Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize