we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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