.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
