I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Randomize
