That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
