My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
