And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
