he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
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