I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
