All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize