Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
