morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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