You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
