I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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