Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
