she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
