So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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