Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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