what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
