Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
