i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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