When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Randomize
