Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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