Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I lost the right to judge tonight
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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