you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
