I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
