Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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