Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Randomize
