I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
