Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Randomize
