So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
that's an acceptable place to lick
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
