Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Buhtt sex?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
