therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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