omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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