It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Randomize
