I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize