so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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