Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
