ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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