Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
