Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
