It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
The ass gains better be worth it
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