I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
