someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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