billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize