This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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