Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Randomize
