Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
