Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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